Goodbyes are rough…
I know this isn’t photo related, but I feel I always talk about things that are important to me or that have made a big impact on my life. I put a lot of my personal thoughts in my blogs for all to see, almost like a live diary. Though I never kept a diary or journal as a kid, I want to post about someone that was and still is very special to me. I’m doing this particular blog to help with the grieving process rather than information to be read, however I don’t mind opening up and sharing part of my life with you.
This passed Monday, January 23, 2012, I said goodbye to a very old and lovable friend, Molly. She was my childhood dog, but so much more than just a pet to me, she was a family member, a friend. If you are an animal lover you can sympathize with the pain that one goes through when you lose a pet. It’s the same as losing a family member, but in my opinion maybe a little worse. You see, the life span is much shorter so you get to see them grow up and go through all the stages of life. You’re their care taker and they couldn’t be more grateful for all the things you do for them by giving constant love and affection. Always a happy greeting at the door no matter how long it’s been. They always have eyes for you and want nothing more than to just be with you. Their your child, completely helpless without you. So when that time comes to say goodbye, its hard to let go of something that loved you more than life itself. The memories are all we have to hold onto and remember that they taught us unconditional love.
Now that the initial pain is calming down, and the sobbing has become just tears I can breathe easy and look for the positive. Everything amazing has happened in June, whether it be as great as a graduation, the birth of a love one since passed, or a small as getting my braces off. A lot of my exciting life moments have happened in June. I didn’t come to this realization until I was looking through Molly’s puppy album and had found a cute story I wrote in 5th grade about the exciting new member to our family, my dear sweet Molly. This all took place June 16, 1997. I was unaware of the exact date we picked her up from the breeder until yesterday (thank you mother for scrap-booking everything). However, as a 10 year old, this was the biggest and most exciting life change one could ask for, my dream dog was finally mine. I had wanted a Dalmatian since I was 3 and had to wait until my brother and I were old enough, as well as settled in our new home in Pennsylvania. So as impatient as I can be, plus waitng 7 years as a young child, it felt like an eternity. Once I had her it was like I had her my whole life. I grew up with her, no matter what major life changes I was going through, she was my constant for 14+ years. Some people don’t even have friendships that long. I’m super grateful that she lived as long as she did. Molly was well known and spread her joy everywhere, in her younger years she used to “escape” out of our house which had the whole neighborhood running around after her with leases, it was a game to her, and little did I know a bonding experience for me. Having her as a pet has taught me so much that I didn’t even realize.
So here is my next big life change, but where is my constant? What will I do? As much as I get frustrated about photo jobs, portfolio work, or anything life throws at me, I need to learn from my younger self.. that in time I will get what I’m dreaming for I just have to be patient. 2012 is a start of a new beginning, unfortunately in order to start a new chapter I need to turn the page on others. Molly has been a symbol of my childhood and even though I’m 25 years old I still always feel like a kid. I guess the true test is ahead, saying goodbye and moving forward is so hard, but I know my love ones passed will help see me through.
So once again, Goodbye Molly, you were the best dog I could ever ask for. There will always be a spot in my heart for you, my sweet spotted couch potato. Love you so much, thanks for making my childhood the best it could be. Rest in peace old girl ♥
April 19, 1997 – January 23, 2012